Light Bulb Experience

My new endeavor.  I'm not sure what the rules are for blogging.  This is just my thoughts, reflections, ideas, experiences and a creation of a map of the journey.  Hopefully it will serve more of a purpose for my brain health than Sudoku.  And, hopefully it won't bring men with nets and white coats to my door!

Well here goes.
I buried by daddy on July 2nd.  One day before my birthday.  He was 78.  Way too young and way to early too leave me here on this earth without him.  Grief unimaginable!

I wrote these words that day:

             " When I had my children I had a new understanding of how deep my   parents loved me. Losing my daddy gives me a new understanding of how deep my love is for him.

             When I had children, my love for them felt like my heart was living outside my body. Losing my daddy feels like my heart has been ripped from my body."

That heart wrenching pain stayed with me from that early morning the greatest man I ever knew took his last breath until just a few days ago.  You know, a defining moment when you "get it"; things you've pondered finally make sense or things you've never given much thought, become paramount.  I call it light bulb moments.

Well, thanks to the grace of God and the sweet Holy Spirit He sent to me; my daddy's words that I can still hear and his actions that are so burned into my being, a much needed "ah ha" (heart light bulb) flooded  from within me. "The Lord is MY Shepherd!   The Good Shepherd."!

The Good Shepherd Statue

The disparaging grief is instantly gone.  Still sad, but not grief stricken.  My new normal.

           
  To be continued...(for the rest of my life)

Johnny Lewis Williamson 4/19/1935 - 6/30/2013